Tag Archives: gospel

Law and Grace; Complementarian Culture and Tone

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Photo credit: Nick Pestov

Two weeks ago, Kevin DeYoung posted a question and a concern about the “New Wave Complementarianism” described by Wendy Alsup in a blog post of hers. Since I’m the one who coined the phrase in conversation with Wendy, I took full responsibility for it in the comments section on his blog. There has been a good online discussion within complementarian circles as a consequence. Pastor Thabiti Anyabwile, who always models a gracious tone for me, commented on the subject here. Owen Strachen, Executive Director of The Council on Biblical Manhood and Womanhood, responded with a gracious post. Christ and Pop Culture joined the conversation here and here, with Brad Williams really giving me things to think about. I also thought Trevin Wax brought up some great points on his blog here.

Some of my complementarian friends and I have conversations via phone or email. We talk about Jesus, the Christian life, motherhood, children, our writing projects, what we are reading and other subjects friends share with each other. One of the concerns has been the disparity or dissonance between what we believe the Bible teaches about men and women, and the current complementarian Church culture. (There are exceptions of course.) Out of one of these conversations with my friend, Wendy Alsup, came the post that ignited this online conversation: A New Wave of Complementariansim. We are thinkers and writers, most of us have other passions as well. However, we care about the Church, and we care about women in the Church. We feel this burden acutely, and because of it, we try to write about these issues faithfully and graciously. Our friend, Hannah Anderson, has done good work on this subject here, a response to Kevin DeYoung here, and here. Wendy has followed up her original post with some clarifications here. The last thing anyone felt was “the impulse to rescue counter-cultural doctrines from their own unpopularity,” as was one of DeYoung’s concerns. As an aside, if anyone is concerned with my Reformed bona fides, I would say that I stand in the theological heritage of D.A. Carson.

I’m not as developed of a writer as Wendy and Hannah but I want to take the time, before the conversation got too far along, to sketch out a foundational issue. This issue is so important that I don’t want to touch any of the theology before this gets addressed.

I’ve been thinking a lot about where this disparity between doctrine and culture and theology and tone comes from. It’s all too easy to chalk it all up to sin, but in reality there are always certain thinking patterns and habits which drive us to sin in certain ways.

I want to show this by way of two examples:

Church A subscribes to what is generally called a complementarian view of manhood and womanhood. The subject matter is preached on from the pulpit. The men are very concerned that the women in the congregation are submissive. Ecclesiastical structures are set up so that the women may only participate in “safe” non slippery–slope areas such as singing, playing the piano, helping in the nursery and teaching Sunday school. The women are also in charge of all areas of hospitality. These doctrines are held as those of primary importance. Sermons range from how women ought to dress in modesty to how to be better wives and mothers. Complematarianism is on everyone’s radar. So much so that skirt and dress lengths start to get judged. There begins to be spoken and unspoken “rules” about women working outside the home, how many children families have, what education choices a family is allowed, what books women are allowed to read, etc. Most families are very careful to keep their marital troubles to themselves lest they should look less “holy.” When a wife finally has the courage to talk to the elders about some issues with her husband she is told to go back and be “more submissive.” Women in this church start viewing each other in a way that allows certain forms of competition to start setting in. Now suppose there’s a church meeting, things are getting heated, when the rubber meets the road, lo and behold we find that quite a few of these women who looked submissive on the outside are not so submissive in heart.

Church B also subscribes to a complementarian view of manhood and womanhood. They see the tides of culture lapping at the door of their church and they want their church members to stand strong against the worldly tide. They love Jesus. The gospel is preached with firmness and compassion every Sunday no matter where in the Scripture the pastor is preaching from. They prioritize heart transformation over behavior modification. They want to encourage men and women to use the gifts God has given them to serve the Church near and far, and so they set up Ecclesiastical structures and opportunities to maximize the giftedness of the congregation. Through modeling and when it comes up in the course of preaching through the Scriptures manhood and womanhood is discussed. The women are encouraged to study the Scriptures above other books, the men also are encouraged to study the Scriptures and opportunities are made available for each to do so. This is not a perfect church. Everyone knows they are a sinner in need of grace from God and from one another. Although there is discernment, the church culture is warm and compassionate on those who find themselves in trouble. There are some marriages in distress and since no one is shamed for not living up to the “complementarian” standard they are willing to go seek help. The elders (who are all men) make it very clear that Christ and the gospel are the center of that church. The elders desire the flourishing of all who are in their care, and so they work at creating a church culture toward that end. They see that in order to have strong families who can withstand the onslaught of the surrounding culture, both men and women need to be invested in. Not wanting to set up marriage or family as an idol they work hard at encouraging these things without falling into the error of making their congregation believe that their identity is in any role, rather union with Christ for men and women is stressed. Singles do not feel less valued.

On paper, both of these churches might look the same. They would have the same statement of faith, possibly a statement on why they have the Ecclesiastical structure which they have etc. But what is the difference? What births such divergent church cultures? It is law and grace. Although in a substantial way their doctrine is the same, the enfleshing of the doctrine is different. Church A’s presupposition in its approach to the doctrine is law. Church B’s presupposition in its approach to the doctrine is grace. It is the very same doctrine yet one sees it as law to be obeyed, the other a grace to be given with longsuffering and love.

Now these are hypotheticals, and not inevitabilities, but follow this dynamic: Although Church A started off with the same doctrine as Church B (on paper) it wasn’t long before Church A started over–reaching and setting up extra–Biblical markers. This happens because when we approach the things of God through “law” it doesn’t take long before we become judges of all we survey.

And so what I believe has happened (again setting aside certain theology which feeds some of these variants) is that many churches in the “complementarian” end of the spectrum have set up a “law” approach to these doctrines. Some of this is tied up with a lack of gospel–centrality (which is something I discuss in my book Gospel Amnesia).

I think if we are honest, we cannot deny this disparity between the theology and the application. Pastor Anyabwile has some great posts on this from January 2011 which can be found here and here and here and here and here. These really are a must read.

If we know there is a disparity, and we can see that what causes it is a law versus grace mentality, then we can move forward and talk about some of the other issues with this as the backdrop.

 

Jesus Didn’t Just Die For Your Sins, He Died For Your Sorrows and Your Grief

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Photo credit: Paulo Philippidis

Many of us are grown up and disciplined enough to push through life. We “grin and bear it.” We live with our silent sorrows and our groaning griefs. We hold them close in our bosom. They have become our “Precious.”

Sin—we get it, we know and confess that only the blood of Jesus washes it away. We get forgiveness, or think we  do.

But what about all those other things we bear in our weak humanity? What of our sorrows? What of our griefs? What of our physical brokenness? What of our mental brokenness? What of all the hardships which pull us down like gravity?

Surely he has borne our griefs and carried our sorrows;

Isaiah 53:4

Jesus didn’t just die for our sins. On that cross he bore all our griefs and sorrows. But we forget. We speak the words of the gospel so quickly and glibly, we miss the depth and height of this awful beauty.

Sin, I repent of. But I am wont to carrying all my griefs and sorrows. I have a deeply ingrained habit of lumbering through life holding on to them. It is so entrenched that I was unaware of how heavy laden I had become until I started dwelling on Isaiah 53. It didn’t dawn on me that Jesus took my sorrows and griefs upon him on that cross. He took the brokenness and misery of us all. “He was wounded for our transgressions; he was crushed for our iniquities.” (Isaiah 53:5) “Yet it was the will of the Lord to crush him; he has put him to grief.” (Isaiah 53:10)

It will do no good to think of “the poor chap in Africa who has it so much worse.” Or to tell myself, “get up and pull it together old girl.” No no… this is not the way of a Spirit–filled, gospel loving woman. No, the answer is to take the sorrows and griefs and lay them at the feet of Jesus—deliberately, and confident in his power. This is hard for those of us who are accustomed to bearing our own burdens. But we are not left to our own strength and memory. We are those who are indwelt with the Holy Spirit. It is he who comforts us and reminds us to lay our cares upon the Lord. We do this by releasing our hold of these burdens and transferring our affections and focus onto Jesus. This requires spiritual discipline and therefore we do it over and over again in this life.

I may not be saying anything new, but we are forgetful creatures. We need constant reminding of who He is, what He has done, and who we are in light of Him.

Gospel Partnerships When We Hold Different Distinctives

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Mez McConnell, director of 20 Schemes Ministries (an organization working with the poorest in the housing Schemes of Scotland) wrote a post titled Why Would A Baptist Want To Help Build Healthy Presbyterian Churches? He discusses how his hope and desire to build a strong gospel–centered Church in Scotland outweighs being schismatic over certain convictions. This is something I discuss in much detail in Gospel Amnesia, going into depth about what happens when Christians are strident over matters of secondary distinctives. Mez’s post inspired me to approach the subject again.

I write a lot about the gospel. But the gospel is more than just something we think about or write about. It is our way of life as Christians. It is our worldview. This means that if I’m internalizing it, it will have an effect on the decisions I make and the way I act in my every day life. Some months back we were approached by our church leaders and asked if we would pray and consider leading a community group in our home. After prayer, discussion and some ongoing training we started our community group under my husband’s leadership. As it turned out, what I thought or meant by community group was slightly different than what our leadership meant. Part of working together for the furtherance of the gospel included me understanding what my pastor’s paradigm was so that I could joyfully submit to it, even if I had a different ministry model in view. My pastor has been a wonderful model for me in gospel partnership.

The gospel when held firmly at center, can bring all sorts of people together to work in love and harmony even when they hold different convictions. Mez is a Reformed Baptist working with Presbyterians to bring the light of the gospel in Scotland. There are many organizations and groups who do beautiful work for God’s kingdom even though individual members may have different convictions regarding different issues ranging from baptism, church polity, church liturgy, etc. etc. As I said in Gospel Amnesia, it’s not that we have to let go of all our traditions, distinctives or convictions, it’s that we are to hold them with humility. When we respect each other, when we give deference to one another, when we resist the temptation to take things personally, the love and unity of the gospel binds us together. We push back the kingdom of darkness through gospel unity. The like–mindedness that you find throughout the New Testament does not mean that we all think the same exact way about the same exact things. It is not, as the ESV study Bible says, an “intellectual uniformity,” rather we are to have a “cooperative spirit, with a focus on the glory of God.”

Paul is not afraid of differing convictions as long as there is unity in the gospel and in pressing forward, “striving side by side for the faith of the gospel.”

Not that I have already obtained this or am already perfect, but I press on to make it my own, because Christ Jesus has made me his own. Brothers, I do not consider that I have made it my own. But one thing I do; forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus. Let those of us who are mature think this way, and if in anything you think otherwise, God will reveal that also to you. Only let us hold true to what we have attained.

Philippians 3:12–16

I used to be a very strident woman. I refuse to swing to the other extreme of being loosey–goosey about everything. In all these things what the Holy Spirit has been teaching me is that he is in charge of where I am theologically and he is in charge of where he has other folks. My job is to push back the kingdom of darkness by using the gifts and talents he has given me, working side by side in gospel unity with those he brings me into partnership with. This includes all my writing partnerships also. Discussions about our differences can be fruitful, and sweet and edifying, when we interact with grace and a deep gospel love for one another.

Protecting Ourselves from a Bitter Spirit

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Photo Credit: Andrew Kuznetsov

When you do what you believe is the good and right thing in life, but God gives you hard providences in return; bitterness is the most human and natural state to slip into. This bitterness can lead to other spiritual, physical, mental and emotional states, like depression, isolation, revenge or even apostasy.

Although most readers of this blog know I try to stay away from didactic writing and an “I’m further along on the sanctification spectrum than you so I can lecture you…” attitude, I have fought long and hard wars against bitterness and I sincerely want to share what little insight and grace I believe I have received from the Lord. So here goes:

If we recognize we have a bitter spirit (no matter how we ended up with it) there are a few things we can do:

1. We confess and repent of it to our Savior. We have a redeemer who was tempted in every way that we are tempted. He knows what it’s like to be tempted to be bitter, and yet he was without sin. Do we really imagine that Jesus when he walked this earth was not tempted to be bitter about the way he was treated, spoken of, or killed? Do we imagine that his human family who were a bunch of sinners like us didn’t mistreat him? Can we not imagine that in his 33 years he must have experienced many occasions which would have tempted him toward bitterness? He was tempted and he overcame. He resisted bitterness in our place.

2. It is profoundly helpful to meditate on the humility of Jesus. He “made himself nothing, taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross” (Phil. 2:7–8). Part of bitterness is believing you deserve better than what you received. Do we really think we deserve anything good? Jesus certainly deserved better than what he got on Earth, and yet he responded in love, and not in bitterness. When we receive hard providences there are really only two ways to go: Pout and get bitter about it, or remember the humility of Jesus and allow the Holy Spirit to use that as a tool to soften our hearts toward God and man. We have hard hearts, but as Christians we have the Holy Spirit who is working in us a heart of flesh—a soft and tender heart toward God and our fellow man.

3. Take appropriate practical earthly actions in response to the hard providence. Don’t bury things in your heart. This is a protection against a bitter spirit. Hard providences come in many forms. There are xn situations that bring discomfort, difficulty, and disappointment, and we need wisdom to navigate these. Sometimes people sin against us and hurt us in bad ways. Dealing with these circumstances with grace doesn’t just mean passivity. If the situation can lead to bodily harm of any kind then we go to the authorities whom God has set up to punish evildoers. If a friend gossiped about you then you can confront the friend and seek a healthy God–honoring way to solve the problem. The response needs to be appropriate to the cause. If you decide to cover it with love, then cover it with love. Don’t pretend you are covering it with love while burying it in your heart and then spitting it in someone’s face later on.

If after prayer and seeking the Lord, the only reasonable and peaceful response you can think of is to separate from the circumstance or person who is being a source to your bitterness then do it. Don’t drag it out. The graceful response may be silently walking away from a person or situation, turning the situation over to the Lord, and asking the Savior to keep your heart from bitterness and moving on.

There are many causes for bitterness in this life. We live in a broken world among broken mankind. There are none righteous, no, not one. But we have a rescuer who came to save this broken world. He loves this broken world. He loves broken me and broken you. He loves us even when we hurt each other. He teaches us through grace and longsuffering how to stop lashing out, how to stop feeling sorry for ourselves, how to stop being envious, wrathful, vengeful, selfish, stubborn, spiteful, unfair, covetous, slothful, greedy, unjust, and how to stop hiding sins. Go to the cross. Meditate on the cross. See there what your great and awesome God has done for you through his humility. And then plead for the grace to walk away from your bitter spirit. Leave your bitter spirit on the cross where it was nailed. Let it die. Let it die.

Miracles and the Will of God

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Last week we paid off the last of the money a very dear friend loaned us some years back. This was money we had borrowed in order for me to have tubal reversal surgery so we can have more children. Yesterday, we celebrated our youngest son’s second birthday.

When I was young, I never really dreamed or even desired to be a mother. I had plans for my life according to the gifting I believed God had given me, but none of it included motherhood. God in his sovereign good will changed all of that—he turned all my plans upside down. He made and continues to make a mother out of me. Selfish me. Lacking in humor me. Distracted me.

Starting from my second pregnancy, I had what’s called a separated pubic symphysis (separated pelvis) beginning around the 4th month. This left me needing a cane to walk and eventually confined me to bed–rest. A separated pelvis is an extremely painful condition, all the tendons and ligaments in the area are pulled apart. My third pregnancy, my third daughter, was the worst. The doctor/hospital were giving me regular Demerol shots starting around week 35 or so. Without prayer, and during a time of pain and frustration, my husband and I decided that I would have a tubal ligation right after giving birth to her.

It was several months after giving birth and the tubal ligation that we began getting into family–centered movements within the Church, and reading and listening to people who were making it sound that it was pretty close to a sin if you choose not to have children. This had its effect on us and I began struggling with regret and bitterness. All the reasons we had chosen the tubal ligation we threw out the window, and we began espousing the idea that more children meant more godliness. This went on for a while, as I struggled with infertility for the first time in my life. Coveting babies, and other spiritually unhealthy habits started setting in. Around this time I started researching tubal reversal surgeries and found that there are Christian OBGYN’s across the country who are willing to do this surgery at cost. They did this to help out fellow sisters in Christ who wanted to reverse this “permanent” condition.

A couple of our dear friends knew our hearts’ desire. They also knew that we did not have enough money to have this surgery done, and they were kind enough to give us a loan to have the procedure. We lived in Southern California at the time  where the few doctors who did perform the surgery were pricey. It ended up costing us less to fly out to Texas, stay at a bed–and–breakfast, and have the surgery at the nearby hospital. In God’s amazing providence, the surgery was scheduled on Good Friday. I was released from the hospital at sun–up on that Easter morning. These providences are deeply meaningful to me. The Lord has done this often in my life and I treasure the symbols he has given: From death to life, from infertility to fertility, from a heart that was cold to children to a heart ready to receive them.

Two months later I was crying at an ultrasound showing a beautiful 7–8 week strong beating heart in the one “good” tube the doctor salvaged.

“We need to get in there right now before it ruptures. The fetus will not survive. It can’t survive. We need to get in there right now,” I heard them say, to which I tearfully responded:

“This may be a fetus to you, but it is a baby to me.” We prayed… we prayed that the Lord will take our baby before they got in there surgically to remove him/her. They called our baby “it,” they told my husband while I was still in recovery that by the time they were able to get in there, the tube ruptured, blood all over my organs, and “it” was gone. But we knew what had happened. We knew God had answered our prayer. Our Lord had taken our baby so that they wouldn’t destroy “it” to help save the tube. Their goal was admirable: to save the one tiny somewhat working tube I had after the tubal reversal. But God’s goals are past finding out. The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away, blessed be the name of the Lord.

They said I would never be able to have children with what I had left, one hardly working and beyond tiny fallopian tube left on the other side. They said I would always have ectopic pregnancies if I ever did conceive again. God’s plan was different.

Miraculously and with a reproductive system that wasn’t operative from a human perspective, the Lord gifted us with two boys. They are now 5 1/2, and 2 years old. We became a family of five children through the hand of the Living God. At each of the pregnancies we were stunned. I continued to have a separated pelvis, at the 4th month I was again in excruciating pain, walking with a cane and on bed–rest. But the Lord … the Lord bore that pregnant belly along with me.

This is not a prescriptive. Please do not misunderstand. I do not believe anymore that it is a sin to set a limit on the number of children a husband and wife choose to have. Coveting children is a sin. Being discontent with the number of children the Lord has given is a sin. I would know and love all my children, whether there were one, three, five, or more, and so God loves his children. Thinking you are being “more” obedient and “more” godly if you have more children is a sin. Idolizing motherhood and children is a sin. I would never want to use our story as a spiritual maturity marker. That is what gospel amnesia brings. God doesn’t keep a checklist, or a tally of the number of our children, to determine his love for us. God doesn’t stand back to see how hard we’ll work, or to what extent we will reach to accomplish what we imagine to be his will. God uses everything, including our clouded, muddled motives to bring about his ends, and his ends are glorious. I have come to see that our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ redeems and overcomes all our sins, and all of our desperate and weak efforts to redeem ourselves from our own sins. Through his gospel he changes everything.

When An Earthly Husband Images Our Heavenly Groom

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Photo Credit: francois

Valentine’s Day is here. It’s a day when our society encourages couples to take the extra steps to show their love for one another. Give flowers. Give chocolates. Go out to dinner. Celebrate love.

Some of you reading this right now are lonely. Some have been abused or hurt deeply by a spouse. Some may be single without an earthly spouse. But all of us as Christians together have a heavenly husband, and oh how great is our Groom’s love toward us!

Scripture is full of the love of God — the cross being the supreme expression of that unfathomable love.

You can read the rest of my post here.

Here Comes Pedophilia and Why The Church Should Care

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In a small blog post over at TGC, Joe Carter discusses an article from The Guardian in his 60 Second Summary: Pedophilia: Bringing Dark Desires to Life. Over at World magazine, journalist Andrée Seu Peterson discusses that same Guardian piece in Culture Creep. Yesterday, Wendy Alsup, with courage and love for the Church wrote Gospel Testimony Amidst Abuse in Our Own Backyard while Jen Wilkin published To Be a Sin–Bearer, an excellent article about bearing each others sins. Why are these pieces important? And why should we care?

Because judgement starts in the household of God (1 Peter 4:17). Because the Church is not immune from sin. And if the Church and people in the Church do not form the vanguard on this, our children will suffer dearly. Our testimony for the gospel will be meaningless. We can tsk–tsk our surrounding culture, but if we don’t show by our actions that we mean business about the sins of pedophilia and the abuse of children, then we have no hope and no objective truth to give to our culture when it cries for help. And one day our culture will cry in anguish and ask: Where were you with the hope of the gospel when this was all coming down, when pedophilia was creeping into the mainstream?

There are philosophical issues to be discussed and those will come, but now is the time to open our mouths with unflinching truth and grace. And like Gandalf we stake our staff on the bridge and cry at the Darkness: You shall not pass! Rise up O Church, rise up and defend the oppressed, the abused, the young and the weak. Rise up O Church and be a sin–bearer.

The Proto–Crucifixion and the Christian

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Photo Credit: Chadica

Sitting in church on Sunday morning (listening to a sermon on Matthew 4:5–7) I formed a term I would like to explore. I don’t know if anyone else out there has used the term proto–crucifixion, I haven’t researched it. But if you will give me a few minutes, I would like to share with you a glorious glimpse into the Word of God. A fresh seeing, as Piper would say.

The book of Exodus starts off with Israel in Egypt and in slavery. The Lord God brings them out with might and power. By Exodus 17, they are traveling from the wilderness of Sin to camp at Rephidim, where there was no water. It is here they start “quarreling” with Moses and “test[ing] the Lord.” Exodus 17 is a beautiful symbol–laden chapter showing a sinful and rebellious people trying their innocent rescuer/redeemer and condemning him to death and then striking him.

Moses uses the word “test” meaning to try as in a trial, to stand in judgment over. God then asks him to pass before the people with his staff (a symbol of judgment) taking the elders with him. The elders representing the jury.

And the LORD said to Moses, “Pass on before the people, taking with you some of the elders of Israel, and take in your hand the staff with which you struck the Nile, and go. 6 Behold, I will stand before you there on the rock at Horeb, and you shall strike the rock, and water shall come out of it, and the people will drink.” And Moses did so, in the sight of the elders of Israel. Exodus 17:5–6

Here we see God standing before the elders (jury) and before the people prepared to receive their judgment. He stands before them, not as judge, leader, or other authority, but as the accused. He stands on the rock, and instructs Moses to strike the rock. Moses strikes the rock and water flows out. It is this scene I am calling the proto–crucifixion. The symbolism and the glory of it all is breathtaking. Here is God, their creator and redeemer. He brings them out to a desert and instead of trusting him because of who he says he is and his past actions, they doubt. They quarrel. They test. They strike. When Moses strikes the rock, that is a symbol for Christ’s crucifixion, for God taking the punishment for and from a wicked people. This is why in Numbers 20:8, the second time they were in the same sort of situation, the Lord tells Moses to only speak to the rock and it will pour forth water. Why? Because Jesus was to be smote only once. The picture is glorious. He comes to rescue, they quarrel and test, he allows himself to be judged and killed by them—but only once. The son of God died once and only once. After that we speak to him, we don’t crucify him again.

I believe this proto–crucifixion is important for modern Christians to understand. First, it displays the depth and the beauty of the plan of redemption. We can meditate on this scene for weeks and milk it for all sorts of truths. Second, it should comfort us that the crucifixion was God’s plan all along. Third, it is a staggering display of grace. Although through Moses God tells Israel that they should not “test” him, he allows himself to be tested by sinful man. Although they quarrel and demand and complain. He gives them what they want—water. Fourth, we should see another nested symbolism: The people were ready to stone Moses, but God in his mercy tells Moses to strike the rock while he stands on it before the people. God takes the blow in place of Moses. We are Moses and God takes our place. He dies so that we may be saved, so that we can drink from the Rock. The proto–crucifixion should build up our faith—showing us a God who loves his people so much that he condescends to come down, takes the judgement and dies on our behalf.

Eating Dirt

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The picture you see is my youngest with dirt all over his face. He had been trying to “eat” dirt while playing outside. I rapidly cycled through shock, panic, pity, and hilarity before bringing him inside and putting him in the bathtub where I proceeded to take a couple of pictures. When my heart rate finally slowed, I began thinking, this is what I do when I think I can get nutrition out of anything other than the Word of God. I end up eating dirt.

Every day we need to feel loved, to believe we are significant, to know we matter. We need nutrition for our soul. These desires are not wrong. They are not selfish. They are not worldly. This is part of being a human created in the image of God for God. We were created to long for love and worthiness. Yet every day we seek to fill these strong and good desires through a hundred different flavors of dirt, dead dust which cannot fulfill, and all the while we neglect to go to the the Bread of Life and the Living Water.

We have real soul needs, but all too often we try to meet those needs with dust which was never meant to feed the soul. We want fullness and contentment; we want rest. Augustine perceptively and wisely said: “The thought of you stirs [man] so deeply that he cannot be content unless he praises you, because you made us for yourself and our hearts find no peace until they rest in you.” Whether we seek our contentment by striving for food, attention, escape, even obsessive excellence in doing something “good,” these things were never made to fit in that hole we have in our souls. That hole was created to be filled by the living God. It was created to be satisfied with Jesus, through the Holy Spirit.

We Are Wives of the Resurrection

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Photo Credit: Rich Bowen

I find it helpful to think in paradigms, particularly in terms of the biblical sequence creation-fall-redemption-recreation. The glorious vision of the recreation of marriage under and in Christ has expanded my small thoughts on the entire issue, to help lift my eyes off the everyday pettiness and look at my marriage through the lens of the powerful cosmic-sized gospel. Read the rest of my article here.